Author: livingseri

confession of an abid

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

This may sound trivial but its the going on 30 series, and im just taking notes of changes i see in myself or a sudden realisation of my own self. Now just today, i realise the type of telekong i wear can affect my concentration in my prayers. I know there is the khusyuk situation one should be in during prayers but i do realise this one important part of myself.

Its when i bought a new set of telekong however unfortunately i did not check properly before actually buying it except asking about the material from the saleslady. So it happened that the headgear had a tight band around the circumference of the face, and the kain was a bit short for my liking. I thought i could bear with the tightness on my face, simply thinking it will expand after a few days. But that first few days left me with headaches and marks on my forehead. And the kain, well, i was always conscious that my feet is not covered properly. I never realise it can affect me so much.

So last friday i bought another new set, the same as my previous one which i had loved. And i have been wearing it sinvce and i am so so happy and comfortable and finally able to focus on the prayers instead of headaches and uncovered feet.

I get into the conclusion, and a bit of advice, to ladies who might have been experiencing difficulties to stay focused, maybe its the praying attire. Change. I knew i changed my old set because it was getting yellowish instead of white. It is usable but it just gets to me that its yellowing instead of pure white. Find a praying attire that you will really like and there are so many choices out there, from material to colour to design. Find one you are comfortable in and will love wearing. When you are in your best attire, you are more ready and focused.

Just like going for an interview for job. You want to give a good impression, of course, you would wear something comfortable and nice enough to present yourself well. You would even buy a new set of dress even! So why not for Lord? Give your best physically and the mind and heart will do the rest.

Having a praying attire that you like wearing will certainly be a form of motivation too. This definitely works with children too!

Ok, i suddenly feel like a productive muslim blogger haha. What happen to the recently bought telekong? Well i am going to wash it and maybe donate it to the mosque as a wakaf. Its only few days old and looks brand new. Insya Allah.

I dont know why this is worth a blogpost, but it matters to me 🙂

going on 30

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

I have been thinking these days. Quite random actually but its almost like a self reflection thinking.

I am going on 30. This year. I have been thinking have i acheived success thus far? Is this what i want to do? Is this good enough?
I have always thought i can do so much more. I am destined for bigger things. But what, i dont know yet.

Its just that apart from working and helping my family now and then, financial wise i am not there yet. I am not into luxury and fashionable items but i do look to travelling. I am twenty years away from half a century and i dont know if by that time i am financially free. I am saving up now. But it would be nice to see my money grow. And it would be really nice to be able to do zakat every year.

You know what my dream is? For my whole family to do haji together. Alhamdulillah my parents have gone to umrah but i aim for haji for them and the rest of us. And then travel see the world together.

And then there’s the success part. Do i still see myself ‘here’? Doing the same thing every year. Or is there something out there for me to explore? I definitely still have the study part to accomplish which i havent got to do yet due to the savings.

What about my husband? He has the money. But yes he has the house to think about and because we are sandwiched in income we had to get something which if i have had a better pay, it would help a lot but no. The daily needs of our lives. as a wife, it is only right that i depended on him. but Well, simply because being me, i am an independent person. I was that before i got married and i would like to stay that way, being the X generation woman that i am.

What if i am not working in the next five years? What if, God forbids, realistically speaking, my husband….you know…lifespan. I really cannot imagine life without him. Oh Lord, i need him. Please grant us strength and health. And that’s another thing: the wife role. I have always been thinking whether i am doing enough to fulfill my responsibilities. I am trying to juggle this working wife role. Maybe i am harsh on myself but i do not think i am doing great in this department!

Oh woman.

like a reminder

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

1. i was going to donate books to the library, i was going through hundreds of my books, and i got to like what, 10 books, which i am willing to donate?? what? seri? all that trouble?

but i really do not have the heart to throw any of my books.

2. going back to my reading habit has given me my sanity. and now, moving on to the next book

3. Oh did i mention: i had loved Francine pascal’s Fearless teen novel series, hmm, a decade and a half ago, although it was the adventure of going to different national library brances (all the way to woodlands sometimes) just to follow the series accordingly…and so while browsing KOBO recently i found out i may be able to own all of them in the form of an ebook!!! i went crrrrrazzzziiiiiee. but stopping myself and bought first three in the series….

4. i know i know…. i havent blog about bali, i havent blog about KL, i havent blog about my parents’ umrah and how emotional we are…

maybe next week. i aim to get a two days’ off in lieu..

alif the unseen

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

Alif the UnseenAlif the Unseen by G. Willow Wilson
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Finally completed the book! I liked the book when its telling about the djinns. But i got bored sometimes when they go all programming. I really wished there is more ‘fantasy’ than tech. Overall i do think it is brilliant to try and concile two extreme realities the unseen djinn and the unseen computer programming using the alf yeom as the link. I really wish there is more to the alf yeom and alf layl revealed along the way. I guess i was really expecting an aladdin kind of story mashed up with technology.
In any case, nice to have a mainstream muslim author in the scene. Keep writing More stories Willow!

View all my reviews

a mountain of crumbs

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

A Mountain of Crumbs: A MemoirA Mountain of Crumbs: A Memoir by Elena Gorokhova
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Russia has always been a mystery to me. And when i saw A Mountain of Crumbs, i did not hesitate to buy it. Loving it so far because it reminds me of how much i love Diary of Anne Frank when i was a teen. I like how it was written in innocence, staying as down to earth as a normal child can be. Currently i am reading on the protagonist in her young adulthood, working and studying. I like that it doesnt talk so much about the politics but a middle class family living their days, struggles of having daily stipend food, working hard to lead a decent life. And author shared significant memories from her life like the death of her father, becoming a guide, her sister’s play.
Overall enjoying the book.

View all my reviews

family love

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

We all love this chinese new year. If we can have four (three for me) full days of public holiday, i really wish for a chinese new year every month! It was so nice to finally be resting after a gruelling january. A deserved break for most of us aye.

I am really grateful for this break. And the weather had been just nice, rainy cool days. But what i loved most was that i got to spend a bit of time with my family three days straight. Got a massage with my mother and sister at the comfort of home at hougang ave 8. I miss my family, the chitter chatter of my siblings and my parents.

I got to go shopping with my parents, for their prep to umrah end of this month. That…i really am happy for. Its just, we will always feel happy seeing our parents happy. Although honestly, i am quite worried for them. I mean, my parents havent really travelled so far, and like letting them go to a far away foreign land, no doubt in a group, i still feel worried for them. My parents are such honest kind innocent people and i know they will be quite out of place not knowing what to do. Not that i know what to do when i have never gone there before myself, but i feel i can take better care of them when i am there. But anyway, my father surprised us all when he already bought the umrah package. I wasnt prepared for it myself but i would have loved to go. And i worry for my mother because she couldnt read the quran as well and no one to accompany her down there if she needs to go anywhere muslimah based. Oh Lord, i leave them to You, please guide them, accept their umrah, forgive them and take care of them.

Looking at another angle, i am quite relieved also i am here so that i can take care of my siblings. Although they can take care of themselves, still, an adult somewhere near them is important too.

Maybe the next time, we can all go together. Amiin.

I got to do things i love and not a second i thought about work.

I wish it is still holiday tomorrow. If only i am not working…;)

bookless reader

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

I know. i love books, madly love books. There were times when i can just sit and read a book the whole day and had difficulties doing other things because i was just so engrossed in a story.

But the era is changing and i am catching up fast. I embraced the ebook reader. I still buy books. No way can i not read a book in its book form. But i also love the ebook for the simple reason of having a couple of ‘books’ in one cool device! I especially love it that classics are available free. And i must say i have downloaded almost all the classics from kobo, my choice of ebook-shop and reader.

Ebooks is also making it easier for my thirst for the fantasy genre. Because it was too many, its the one genre which i cant afford to buy. The library had been my sanctuary for them books. But as in the case of george r martin’s games of thrones, i purchased them online as ebook collection and i got them at a much cheaper price and i can bring all 4 books wherever i go! Hwahwahwa.
Still, only the favourites though. I will still make the library relevant by visiting them now and then for my fantasy fix.

Not forgetting those emagazines! I love them too haha! Especially reader’s digest! It gives a different experience of reading that mag with videos a click away and the animations they have! Very cool! Just this month’s, when u ‘open’the e-mag, you are greeted by this celebrity featured!

Nevertheless, as all booklovers all over the world, we still want to read books in its natural way. Its the joy of reading it, admiring the cover, flipping over the page to keep on reading, slipping a bookmark(in my case, colour coordinated) with a heavy heart because you do not want to stop. And more so, in these times when you are always connected and screen eyed, you just want to look away and go easy on the eyes with some nice book, with a nice hot drink, and just indulge in another life, another world, another story.

I really really hope the luxury of holding a book is not lost in time. And yes, my children will be book lovers too. Definitely.

the alchemist vs the aleph

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

i had loved the alchemist. full stop. no doubt about it. it is the one fiction book which i read over and over.

i enjoyed the journey that the protagonist went through, truly enjoyed them. i loved the wisdom behind every trip he made. i loved the spiritual and mystic elements of it.it made me bring myself up again should i read it in times of difficulty.

and after so long not reading paulo’s books (after several other books i had read) came the aleph. i bought the book as soon as it came out in the bookstores. just the title itself is intriguing. so when i bought it, i thought the alchemist all over again?!

but somehow after reading the first two chapters, i was kind of disappointed with it. it was nothing like the alchemist.

it was about the author’s experience, a journey he took. i wanted to enjoy this trip he took but i just find it draggy and dry. i wanted to know who is the girl, his protagonist which is supposed to be connected to him in the past. but right until the end, i still dont know who the girl is, i mean not as much as i wanted apart from being a violinist virtuoso and the past being accused as a witch…i wanted to know more about this travelling in time aspect he mentioned many times in the book, but it just felt boring.  it wasnt exciting at all and the fact the the journey back in time was him being some sort of priest.  it’s just…urgh..

it was not a story i would have loved. i just read through it wanting to know what’s next but my thirst unsatisfied. all i remembered from the book was how dreary, tiring and uncomfortable the journey was for everyone. and i had to wait right till the end for what i think is the peak of the story. it took me very long for me to finish reading this book, a good pause of a few weeks after reading past the third chapter because i felt i wasnt ready for the aleph.

and the whole idea of this aleph. the book isnt about the aleph. he should give a different title for this book.

heck, i had even enjoyed the witch of portobello. even his experience in the zahir. i loved every page of the zahir!

maybe i should read the aleph again…next year and maybe i will understand better what it is all about. but for the first time ever, i am disappointed reading a paulo coelho book.