i have to thank my little companion for this downtime i am having.

we sent our little one for sterilization, and being the three busy working adults at home, one of us has to stay and care for her for the next few days. i volunteered. she is my little one after all. i will take that responsibility with much eagerness and a reason to stay out of work. a reason i yearned for the longest time, since, well, first Jan. exaggerate much.

but really, january had been such a challenging month. i had headaches almost daily after work. i worked 6 days a week for, oh yeah, the whole of January. i don’t think we all had a good start this month. not me anyway.

so thank you little one for giving me this reason to lay down and be quiet. for the busy mind to loosen some knots and just, be quiet. for these shoulder pains ive been having to feel less strain. you know how they say, you need to take care of yourself first before taking care of others. it’s true right, we rarely do that. i think i owe myself this a lot.

anyway, taking care of this little one, feels just like taking care of a child, except there’s no cries and diapers to take care of, haha.

we sent her to the vet on monday morning at 10am, without food since 10pm on sunday, she’s a bit playful biting my toes in the morning, trying to tell me im hungry mommy feed me. but i cant baby. (haha, crazy mommycat convos in the head). but we played along, played some hide and seek to distract her, let her sit by the gate listening to the neighbourhood noises outside and waiting for some birds to fly by, she get excited by those, little nose and ears twitching. she’s happy both mommy and daddy is home to play with her on a monday.

prepped her with lots of small talks since last week though. so when we put her in her bag, she kinda seem nervous but still fine, because hey, we’re on for a short road trip.

in the car, as always, she wanted to be out of the bag and move around in the car. i let her out she’s excited looking out the window. but she knows she’s in for trouble.

reached the clinic, let her roam around a bit and she is obviously nervous. running to find some place to hide and hear this, actually mewing! she even went inside her bag willingly, because i think that is her security spot at this unfamiliar place. she settled under my chair but when a couple came in with their cat, she quickly hid behind her bag which was on the chair beside me. we comforted her, stroked her and she kept quiet waiting patiently for her ‘fluffy’ name to be called in.

finally, the moment came, brought her in and she was purring nervously. my heart breaks seeing her nervous like that. both me and hubby were reluctant to leave when the vet says, ‘ok you can go now, we will take care of her.’ But we were like ‘are you sure? do you need help putting her in the bag? do you need us to calm her down?’ haha. as if, the docs needed help?!

gave her a hug and some kisses. she gave us this ‘mommy/daddy don’t leave me’ kind of look, and trying to wriggle out of the nurse’s embrace. oh gosh. i finally know what it meant by searation anxiety, i think. haha. coz my heart was beating nervously as we walked out of the clinic. but bearing in the comfort that the experts will take care of our little one. my heart really breaks. so it was only 5.30pm onwards are we allowed to fetch her.

so after, 6 months of having the little one always home to be taken care of, i can say, i had a rare monday of what it used to be. i could do anything i want, free of responsibility. but it felt different. i was like…oh no, no Kechik around to play with. no Kechik to feed or sleep with…and then i’ll be like, come on Seri, like few more hours, jangan mengada. haha.. (but apparently i had to go back to work for a short urgent meeting, so there goes my ‘free’ monday)

it was a relief when the clinic called to inform that the surgery is done and Kechik is fine and she’s awake. i was like…awww my baby is ok and awake. and what do you mean she’s awake? she’s not sleeping? the kind nurse replied, yup she’s awake after the surgery. but come after 5.30pm to fetch her.

6pm and we’re on our way. the nurse told us again she’s fine and good to go. she’s been awake and just sitting down staring looking at the people around. now that i think about, i think she’s been awake, probably a bit stoned and unaware of the situation, but probably just sulking and waiting for mommy and daddy.

i think she’s just anxiously waiting for us to fetch her.

in the car, immediately she wanted to be out of the bag. i thought she would look drowsy or something, but she did look pretty awake and aware. let her out again, she smelled around and decided this is the car she knows and then slept on the seat. only then we can see she’s still pretty much weak. she just wanted to be assured that she will be back with her family before finally feeling relief and then she can sleep properly. i was like, feeling, heartwrenching lah baby ni.

let her sleep at home. drank a bit but she still don’t want to eat yet. let her sleep on the floor at her fave spot near our closet. but here’s another heartwarming moment.

we didnt want her to have to jump up and down the bed so we let her sleep on the floor. but sometime in the middle of the night, she woke and went to my side of the bed (which is like a lot of drowsy steps from where she was sleeping), i heard a little mew and she was peeking up at me. im like awww… you want to sleep with mommy daddy? ok come up. bring her up and let her sleep soundly with caresses, beside me throughout the rest of the night. haisssh Kechik ni. kalau dah manja, manja betul.

but my Kechik is strong. third day now. and she’s healing fast. eating ok, we applauded when she finally pooped haha. she wanted to be out of that uncomfortable collar, in fact, managed to squeeze her head out few times to lick herself. her naughty self back again.

she’s now stubbornly sleeping in SIL’s bedroom toilet. yes its clean. ive stopped worrying about that. whichever is comfortable for Kechik. sleeping with that cone on. kesian. give her 2-3 more days and we’re taking that out permanently haha.

get well soon baby and we can play hide and seek again.