3 bulan purnama

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

while watching the match between celts and the saxons (if this is historically correct) and between trying to do my assignment and some 2011 edu-planning…and some tom yam maggi sharing with my little sister…

reality check approximately 3 more months to go!! i’m glad certain things are almost settled like the catering and the deco, bridal and dresses chosen (unless i saw something nicer and decides to change, hehe). even my sisters’ bridesmaids dresses and waiting for the cards to be readily printed, i’m excited!!

while it’s still gss, i want to find a pair of shoes which can match all the dresses, if possible…and i hope my indonesian friend managed to get that ‘thing’ i’ve dreamt of wearing and while i can still spend, i want to shop for some personalized items!!

love surfing the many weddings websites and WE(DDING) tv gives me the thrill~

wahhhh so many things to do!

ok, on to other stuffs for the time being!

monday morning

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

Assalamualaikum~

good morning people!

it is, no doubt, a monday morning when school reopens today and public transports return to its hustle and bustle of crowdedness, and students and adults rushing to work…except me (and maybe a few other fortunate people out there)

i took leave today.

and i hear the birds chirping and the neighbourhood cleaner sweeping at the park, and the sound of people walking, occassionally i heard mandarin conversations and the sound of bus 112.

wahh…seri macam nak tulis essay for O Level ah. 🙂 hehe.

but yes, after almost 3 months of not blogging and missing it a lot, this morning i woke early despite sleeping in late last night and somehow i couldnt sleep again, i thought, why not blog? before i start on some work. i definitely need time alone to rejuvenate my soul and re-motivate myself.

work is ridiculous. it was the june holidays but i except for a one day off in lieu i took, it was pretty much the same work schedule, even finishing work later than usual! what’s with the courses taking up much of my time from work. i have plans to work out, reports to do and library arrangements to work out and youth events to keep up to date since some other colleague seems to need to be pushed to do, and finding trainers to fill up my shoes and relief trainers to find as well. it is a lot to do and sometimes i feel very much irritated when other people seems to take things lightly. this is nasty me comparing myself…i could count with my fingers my off or leave or null-mc since day one i started work at this mosque. and my heart body and soul is dedicated to this work, there’s so many works that needed to be done and some people actually claimed their rights of a holiday, when face it, their working hours are much lesser than expected! given too much leeway already! i understand them and the least i’m asking from them is spare a small priority to the pending tasks.
and nowadays, i feel more tired than usual and its got nothing to do with the world cup.

ok let’s stop. it’s definitely a nice morning and i thank Lord for giving me this and i do not want to spoil the serenity.

i pray for better days and the near future change might be a doorway to more changes. and i hope my significant other will always be there to support me. it’s a lot of hardwork. but nobody said marriage is easy. and truth be told, i’m feeling anxious already with the preparations and that there’s many things i havent done.

to everyone out there, spare a do’a for me.
thanks.

have a great week ahead. insya Allah.

handle with care

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

i’m indulging myself in jodi picoult’s handle with care and perhaps cure this sadness and crushed feeling i’d been having the whole week. and just trying to forget the whole thing and bring myself up to face whatever needs done next.

it made me wonder why am i doing all this? what is it i want to achieve out of all this hard work? when in one ear fiery remark can tore your heart. but like a senior adviced, don’t show your emotions and stay strong. and here i am, being strong. as always.

the thing is, if my being busy is my mistake and a bad reason to not have called, as opposed to parents’ -quote-busy the whole year-unquote- well with all due respect to all parents out there, let’s do the math:
i am busy because i have other 600 students(as oppose to two teens) to care for and making sure they really learnt what they should have been learning at home in the first place.
i am busy because i have 600 students to discipline and learn how to respect, when parents don’t show that they respect other people.
i am busy because i have 1200 parents’ bizarre expectations and demands to sanely deal with.
i am busy because i have 5-DIGITS dollars of unpaid fees to think of recovering.
i am busy because i have 9 team members who i have to keep together to be able to deliver the job in the most perfect manner. and i mean perfect.
i am busy because i have only 365 days in a year to save my ass before 600 students and 1200 parents made me accountable when facing HIM after a lifetime.

so do i apologise for being busy?

i am not saying my responsibility is any bigger or harder than parents. no. their responsibility and busy-ness is of utmost nobility. but with that nobility, i do not think it gives parents the high and mighty-ness to snap at me or any other asatizah. if i can show them all respect, as i have been taught by my own parents, couldnt they give a speck of that to us? i mean, please, enlighten me, i do not understand why cant there be mutual respect?

well i am not generalising, this happened among some, while many others have been very supportive and i am truly truly grateful of that.

and i hope there is no one out there who’s hurt by this post of mine, but if the reader happens to be a parent, let’s think about it…why do we always complain when teacher did so much. why are we unable to respect teachers, no matter how young they are when they are taking a portion of the burden of educating the children?

my parents have never shown disrespect to my and my sibs’ teachers. and we’ve learnt that. and i pray that when i have children, i will respect their teachers.

i am but a small fry in this world.

seri in wonderland

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

i’m so mesmerized by the colours of the movie that i fail to see the lessons on philosophy in alice in wonderland.

but at the moment, all i can think of is dreamland, work has been very hectic (has there been a time when i complain work is NOT hectic?) heart body mind and soul hectic.

and i wanted to blog about so many things but after reading my close friends’ blogs and seeing how so many people are so much in love that i cant help but feel blessed that me too have someone to love. 😉

so, it seems like the acronym of the moment: ILY. so i want to say it too.

to you and only you. ILY.
😀

speeding thoughts

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

there’s going to be our very first maulid rasul celebration at the mosque this saturday and it’s making me restless. i couldn’t sleep the whole of last night just thinking about it! i keep going through the things that needed to be done over and over, worried that i will forget them the very next day! it’s almost like a speeding train not knowing when to stop :/

when i did get to sleep, i think i slept for a short while before the alarm sounded and then aware of my sisters walking about getting ready for school. as soon as i reached work, my mind already reeling with so many things.

but i know everything will turn out well, insya Allah. i really hope it will. speaking of which, tomorrow i have to call up people!! don’t forget that seri! and email those applicants who want to teach!

ok. breath in breath out. things will go well. am excited and nervous. but hey, i always feel like this before every event. haha!

and the best thing would be to play as many selawats as possible on this day. i always felt my heart ‘jumping’ with joy everytime we played a selawat. i missed those feeling. and i missed those times at my old school when we have our very own session of maulids. if only among my teachers are almaarifians who could reminisce with me those beautiful times and perhaps, have it as a culture at school. i wouuld love those. (hehe, better start looking for juniors who are willing to teach:))

*************

and because you dedicate the song to me…
i.m.y. yes. you.

greek pseudo gods and a stealing monkey

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

i am truly and really grateful for this chinese new year break. do you know how much i desperately need this break? to be away from work physically and just recuperate. having some proper family time and not having to worry about work.

a good break alhamdulillah, and now on to the other quest that i’ve set my mind on, which hasnt been going on really well. it’s difficult, really. it’s like being trapped in this cocoon and struggling very hard to free yourself from that grip of invisible hands. but i must free myself. and it’s all in the heart and soul. it’s difficult.

i watched percy jackson twice. and not because i love the movie, but one time with dearest one and the second time with dearest ones. but percy doesn’t give me any more excitement than my renewed interest in greek mythology with all its chaos and family feuds, and i mean it, family feuds and all its complicated cosmology. i was truly fascinated with greek myths as soon as i can read by myself and it was the reason i loved fantasy and myths. and yes roman and greek myths are different although inter-influential between the two. looking forward to clash of the titans for something more concrete and real.

valentine’s day the movie was nicer. it shows how much things can happen in twenty four hours and it revolves around love and loving and being loved in all its goodness and bad.

and if i’ve walked 10km or so sometime ago, yesterday, i got to cycle double the distance to and fro (home to upper/lower pierce) and i love it! the thought that i can go almost anywhere in this island and distance become less an obstacle. all the cycling took us only about two hours! it does help ‘clear’ my mind and let out some sweat, which is a rare thing to me:) i love the scenery of trees and reservoir, and the fresh air and i’m still a little scared of the little monkey who stole our famous amos(!) 🙂

i wish this break is longer…even after two day extension of this break. i need more!! hehehe.

but i am happy. and i think i’m refreshed and willing to start work with a new outlook. positivity and clear of doubts or stress.

alhamdulillah. haza min fadhli rabbi.

that’s it!!

/ livingseri / Leave a comment

that’s it i’m officially stressed!! Yes stress is good stress is motivating yada yada yada. but right now i’ve had it!

i hear so many complains from fellow colleagues about this and that and i feel stupid because i cant help them and then there’s the teachers with their this and that. it’s like i have 101 things to do and i have to listen to 101 things and then there’s all these expectations and plannings and implementings needed to be done just to ensure things are going the right way!

i just want to do my job right. is that too much to ask??!!

i mean, God, sometimes i love what i’m doing but sometimes it’s just too much.

yes there’s some workshops attended and then tips to manage this and that but really, when there’s too many spiderwebs, you just want to sweep them away!

*i’m screaming in my head*

and let’s not talk about this abode!