Just finished class and have 30 minutes to spare before going to pasar malam with the girls.

For those who didn’t know Mekar is the name of the programme my mrc is planning with mahallah uthman, which as it seems now, not so blooming, with so many internal conflicts, pressures from others, too many work to do within a SHORT time and hurt feelings among committees. And the things is, I always received unwanted and unexpected messages at inappropriate times.. while I was engrossed in class and someone smsed with resigning from the programme, when I had just step afoot in IIU, another smsed she’s having family problems, could she resign? or when I was trying to complete ASSIIUM job and received some disturbing sms about Mekar meeting. It’s just stressful and intimidating up to the point of me resigning from this unMekar! And I can’t show it, just because I’m the leader for the girls’ side and so many of us are already showing signs of disappointment and dispirited, I have to be the face of strength for them and I just don’t know how I can convinced them when even my heart is not really into it.

And I pity brother director himself because he faces some stress himself. I just hope this event goes well. I really do pray.