i am in pain.
honestly.
and if anyone asked how does it feel to have a papsmear checkup? i would tell her its a nightmare.
it still is.
and no, i am NOT going to give you details about it. and NEVER will.
my level of pain tolerance was 0.
and like the crybaby i have ever been, the moment i see my mother, i burst into tears like there is no tomorrow.

but what i want to tell you here is how Allah sent me comfort and companion throughout the ordeal.
i went there alone with the innocent thought of it would be a normal checkup. but when it was not, i am just glad that there was a male doctor who lent his right hand to be ‘crushed’ by me and two female nurses who cared for me not leaving me alone for the next half hour i was left to rest in the doctor’s room. and one of them a Muslim nurse, whom i could ask some intimate questions.

and what are the odds that when i was well enough to walk, feeling alone and in pain and still feeling like i can faint anytime, i went to the taxi stand with not enough cash (although i asked my little sis to wait downstairs with some cash to help pay the taxi fare). with a long queue, i turned around and see a malay lady queuing behind me. i asked her. ‘Kak, could you save me this queue, i need to sit.’ she smiled and she said no problem, go ahead and sit.
and then, she asked, where i lived, i gave her my parents’ home and surprise surprise, she lived nearby, clearly, Hougang Ave 8 blk 677, why not we take the same taxi?

I am truly touched and I know this is God’s work. i am so grateful with His help when i was in pain and in need. Thank You Allah for taking care of me.

Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah.