in my line of work, family and friends are sometimes surprised when i say ‘oh i have so many meetings this week,’ ‘i have due dates to rush for.’ and then i either try explaining to them what i do, for the past 7-8 years now, or i just say ‘yah it’s just, you know, work’. perhaps the idea of working at a mosque, is still pretty much sit and…..do…nothing? someone should come up with a series of life of a mosque worker.

oh my god, did i just come up with a brilliant idea? 😛

my and my ideas.

i have been reading books on trying to find myself, like for the umpteenth time, and found some answers or ‘advices’ which pretty much knock some senses. like “How To Be Everything” by Emilie Wapnick, which really resonates with me, gives me a lot to think about and practical exercises to go about and ‘find my way’, and then there’s Kikki K’s The Life Plan by Shannah Kennedy, which, by right, i bought it because it looks like a pretty book, honestly, and (by left) quite useful too in some ways: finding your life values, time management, etc.

and recently, When to Jump by Mike Lewis. No book gave me straight answers, but i am devouring them with the knowledge that these are all signs. this current book in particular screams ‘passion’ ‘mission’ ‘calling’ ‘what am i afraid of?’ what’s the worst that can happen?’ and ‘

what do you believe in?

‘

(Sidetrack: i’m either a clingy mothercat or just lack of love, haha, i find love in the very fact that my Kechik roams around the house, and always come back to me..like, now im blogging, i thought she’s somewhere around the house. when i turned around, she’s actually laying napping behind me. she shadows me around the house….i’ll play around go anywhere i want, but still come back to mommy. heart-eyed. lol)

anyway, back to what i was saying… i look around me…sink in all these experiences, these meetings, be open to receiving it all again, perhaps, a glow of fire re-ignite somewhere. but the life vane (wind vane, get it?) is not pointing to a straight direction. it moves a lot. stopping at a time at one direction and then it changes pointing to a different possibility. but one thing i know, it changes this year. a little pendulum tells it so. what is it though?