it had been buzzing for a few months now. that cloud at the back of your mind of whether a change is inevitable. or if forever is here.

i went through my daily routine without braking. did what i had to do and try to accomplish clearing as many pending tasks as possible, without a doubt rushing for time. there is never enough time to do them all. i’m always trying to speed up my work pace. time is not on my side. and i cannot catch up fast enough.

i guessed no matter what awaited me, i would go with the flow and continue doing what is expected of me. it does not feel like it’s going to happen. and then i got excited with studying again and things seem to be how it was supposed to be.

and then the buzz got louder, the cloud seems heavier and change seems to be nearer. and then suddenly it seems to be making the stops for me. i don’t seem to be running away fast enough. is forever never going to be? is it finally time to say what i dread to say? or will this path lead me to what is best for everything we fight for and worked hard for? is this really happening?

how hard can it be to say goodbye?