I have RM100 cash with me, Ratu suggested I should buy a new pair of lens, but I think I want to buy a book instead. A leisure reading book. Should I or should I not??

Back in IIUM and faced with three midterm exams!! Well, I think I did well for my Methods of Da’wah test, not sure for the other two which was Qur’anic Prophetic Texts and Social Control and which!!! For Soca Control I could have done better!! I do not know why but I’ve been reading a lot on it but I couldn’t seem to remember the points well and mixed up all the theories!! DAMN!! And the ever so forgetful me forgot that I had one soca control extra class way back before thebreak and surprise surprise, there’s a question on the lesson taught on that ‘fateful’ class!!! And the so ever forgetful me forgot that Prof will be giving fill-in-the-blanks kind of questions and so all that I need to do was read the points he gave instead of reading the whole thing, like it was going to be long essay questions!!! Oh my Lord, have I done badly in the test??? I think I have two more quizzes to go for this class and therefore I’m going to do better in them.

For QPT, Ustaz came in late, and he gave only one question which, after he announced it, the first thing that came to mind was ‘kepala otak ah!!’ Not to the Ustaz but to the question, because it was so unexpected!! I hope I answered well but…..

Whatever it is, I’m done with all the tests and now will be concentrating on my assignments. There’s three to go. Thank Lord, I’m not busy with programmes, except there will be an intermahallah debate, which I’m not that enthusiastic to be busy with but of course I cannot run from it!

Kak Mizah came last week with her fiance, Abg Alamak@Man and we went to this restaurant with an additional person who, I don’t know why but something’s just not right. Because it was supposed to be the five of us and Abg Man ONLY and I know this person had to be there just because we need someone to drive us and need two cars because there’s a total of six of us and plus him= 7. Mint had asked me about asking him along and I was not very sure about it, and thought maybe hafiz tomok may be a better choice because tomok was like one of the ‘girls’ among us five and he is more closer us all. But Mint was faster and had asked him already before I could suggest tomok. But why wasn’t I happy having him along? And seriously right at this very moment I am so not in a mushy or teasy mood, like for example, there’s nothing funny when Mint or Qadr teased me with him. Seriously not funny and deep in me, actually hoping I won’t see him these few days. Why this mood?? And knowing that he actually knows qadr’s number and had called her asking where is, not me, but Mint. He called me too but not for the sake of calling me!! But to ask where is Mint and I know it was only about a camera but it’s like he calls everybody now?? But again ME, why the moodiness?? And throughout the outing with K.Mizah and A.Man, I was so not the good me. My reason to them was I had a test and did not sleep since we arrived that morning and feeling tired. And another thing was I don’t like to think that he thinks he’s one of us now, or like there’s really something going on between me and him because my friends are his friends now. Don’t blame me but he’s the one who’s going to be leaving after this semester and it’s his fault for not doing something earlier rather than now and so I don’t want to be too involved. And I’m not going to start going out every other weekend abd be spending money on useless and time wasting things! Please!! I don’t have the money!! It’s just shit lah!!!

I’m just not in a romantic mood at the moment.

And I’m thinking Indera Bangsawan – the monkey prince.
Ok,ok Indera Bangsawan is this old Malay film with my favourite old-time hero -JINS SHAMSUDIN, he’s Indera Bangsawan, a handsome wise and strong prince who turned himself into a monkey to be a companion and at the same time, protecting a beautiful princess as ordered by his mystic grandfather. So yeah, he’s my Monkey Prince, Indera Bangsawan.
Another would be Dandan Setia, the fairy-Charmed prince, because this prince was the cousin to a princess(duhh) who was a reincarnation of a bidadari/dewa-dewi.

So when is my prince coming???

Just admit it, I’m still thinking of that major character.

1 more day to go for the Singapore Seminar.
(gee, i’m hungry, I can’t think of what to write!!!)There’s a lot going on with this seminar but that will be compiled into one whole saga later on. (as always)

I’ve been a certified couch potato if not for the business with the Singapore Seminar which gives me something to do and the occassional dragging of my own feet just to read the pages of my many notes and readings. and oh yeah, that huge book on manual of da’wah. Come on Seri, wake up!! An aspiring dai’e should have more energy!! And re reading The Alchemist gives some inspiration and motivation for me to go on.

kinda have a few more minutes in netforce games, i’m done doing the consolidated list for participants to the singapore seminar. (getting nervous by the days. and people are getting uptight somehow and rather bossy should i say, but it’s normal. i’m used to it. hopefully the things go well and a success! Please Allah..

back in singapore, yeah.

Yey!! Semester break already aka cuti lagiiii!!!
Two things got to keep in mind during these i don’t know..10 days break:

1. SINGAPORE SEMINAR
A week’s busy preparing for this grand event. And to think that ASSIIUM is the main organizer next to MUIS, well we’re almost the backbone, MUIS the BUDGET and the BIG people, of course. May ALLAH bless this effort.

2. MIDTERM EXAMS
Three papers waiting immediately after the break.

Still there’ll be plenty of time for NEED FOR SPEED MOST WANTED!! Hehe can’t wait to race through the milestones! Time to rebel in the virtual world!!

Going back tomorrow!! I’m feeling so eager to go home, after a few weeks here. Can’t wait for bedtime stories with my Ratu. haha. Though Shasha and Aili are not going back for eidul adha!! (senang ckp raya haji)why girls, why??!! 🙂

at the same time, suddenly reminded of the friend who must already be at makkah for haj. hope that he’ll be safe there.

and i’ll be having quite a long break, even though there’s supposed to be classes on monday but good hearted lecturers cancelled them, except for one, but heck, just this once~

2006!!

I’ve wasted an hour already on the net browsing for blog skins. an hour meaning RM2 gone with the wind~ And I initially wanted to spend some time here. I already spent the day at the lab, but that was to draft out 2 letters that a certain president of a society asked me to help out, and I managed to do it within an hour, and then spent another hour looking for some articles to refer for an assignment.(Already??!! -about time to) Went back to my room, have a half hour nap, had dinner, watched tv, contemplated on some things and here I am. At last, where I belong~ whatever.

So ok, Intercultural. And you know what? The very word of it is ready to make me vomit!! Undoubted. De facto. Verbatim. Truly. I’ve had enough of interculturals!! For the time being at least~ And thankfully, it passed.

The mahallahs of the university organized this supposedly grand annual redundant event known as the InterMahallah Cultural Week 27th -29th December 2005. All mahallahs were involved and it so happened that my beloved mahallah was given the responsibility to be in charge of the Intercultural Performance Competition. It was supposed to be fun. It was fun alright but the whole work process for it was almost preposterous. The central committee were preposterous!! Not my committee. I was the programme manager for this competition and observed all those rules and procedures. I hope I was good. I didn’t ask to be the manager but the experience was worthwhile. It was an achievement that I managed to give out ideas and people believed in me and trusted me in carrying out this humongous task. And Thank ALLAH that I got through it. All those meetings, the conflicts, the attitudes from different people, the worries, the late nights. Allah knows what else. But in the end I love it all. Truly am. Even when on the night itself, the technicalities went ridiculously bonkers to the MAX!! I still love it. That I could say that was MY programme. It was sweet. That I actually made a very hardheaded person cried just by trying to clear things out and I don’t even have to raise my voice.

By the way, my mahallah’s teams, only the drama team managed to get the third place. The hosting team didn’t win for the intercultural competition which was fine by me considering the people on those team, except for the Turkish girls, were rather snobbish and thought they were damn good. Heh Serve them right!! And because of them, my committee had to scratch their candlewaxes using keys at 1 am!! The singing team was good but one of the singers was out of tune, so too bad. I dreamt of glory in this cultural week competitions, after our overall championing in Uni Sports Carnival. But I guess the pinky girls deserved it.

Now that the days had passed, as always, felt quite lost but a burden lifted off my shoulders. Busy days will come again. And let me say this, the tranquility is only for awhile.

I’m seriously going to miss these days. Sometimes, I’m almost afraid ofletting go.

Now I’m going to talk about the major character in this blog once upon a time, it’s the friend’s birthday yesterday and take it as a tribute to the friendship we once had.

Wishing the friend a happy birthday. And purposely delaying in sending a bday message to the friend even if it’s only a day. I had wanted to not even wish at all but guilty conscience overcame my bitterness, considering that I used to be the one eager to wish him, so eager in fact that I counted the days to the day. Stupid? Yes. totally stupid now that I think about it. And another reason was I was out yesterday the whole day!! (as in what’s written previously) And there’s another reason – it’s something like childishly getting back at him because he himself was late in wishing me on my birthday this year, like it doesn’t matter to me, or to him! When he used to be eager in wishing me, like the beautiful gift he gave once, or the rushing back home to long distance call me, or be the first to msg me when the clock striked 12. Honestly, I missed those friendly times. Truly. Now, it’s just like we’re almost strangers. Even when I called him during last semester break, I know I have a lot of things to talk to him but the words won’t come out. Like I don’t know him anymore. Once upon a time, everything was about me and everything was about him. Not ‘us’ definitely. There was never ‘us’ but our care and concerns were for each other. We’ve lost that connection now.

On his birthday, I’m hoping for better days for him and me, without that old me and him. And the friendship we once had will be sweet memories, that he was once the one that matters to me, he still matters to me, but it’s just not the same. I will not and cannot even imagine what will happen in the future. All I can say is, I missed the old him.
“The Reason” to this tribute~

I have no title for this entry. Because i don’t want to put in king kong because it doesn’t sound that nice and I can’t write the name because i’m shy about it, haha, and I couldn’t write the place…hmm, I suppose I could, One Utama but…I’l just leave it at that.

And actually, I’m having second thoughts whether to add in this story I’m so very eager to let out but at the same time, just totally shy about it. Totally. But other than my Ratu whom I messaged yesternight about this, there’s no one knows about what happened yesterday. I can’t actually described what I’m feeling, it’s a mixture of happiness, over the stars, guilt, uncertainty but definitely ‘can’t -believe-it happened’

But if I were to write about yesterday, it would be kind of a long story because I have NeVeR included this character in my blog before. There’s that friend who’s been the major character so far, and there’s Adit who left. I’ve known this new person for quite some time but I never talked about him here. And if I were to talk about it, people who know me, like the girls and Dyan, who reads sometimes, might be kind of shock about it. Because it’s so unlike me, I know that. But I’m so about to burst out right now!! But I guess I’m not ready yet to tell it all.

There’s only king kong as witness~

Shoutouts to them whom I call the girls : Mint, Qadar, Qzai, Shasha, Aili@Suli, Za, Wai, Aisyah Spec, K. Dewi, Far, Ilham. And last but not least : Kak Mizah!! Miss you all!!